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ASK A STRAY DAD: LAUNDRY DAY

If New York wants to seriously call itself the best city in the world, it needs to fix the washing machine.  Q: Where are you going with all that stuff? Are you moving out? A: Hah! I wish! This is seven weeks’ worth of dirty clothes, towels and sheets, tied up in two precariously thinContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD: LAUNDRY DAY”

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ASK A STRAY DAD 11:

ON RUNNING Q: Why are you wearing that ridiculous outfit? You look like a tube of lipstick wearing a knit cap. A: Because I made a bargain that if my friends and family raised over $180 for P’s Run for the Arts fundraiser, I’d run 20 miles—80 laps of a standard track. Only I’ve beenContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD 11:”

ASK A STRAY DAD 10:

ON HOSERS: An Existential (and Ultimately Fruitless) Interrogation of One of New York’s More Curious Habits. What are you doing? Why, rinsing off this patch of sidewalk with a garden hose, of course. Why? It’s 6:30 in the morning. It’s just a thing we do. New Yorkers. We New Yorkers. Us. Did someone throw upContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD 10:”

ASK A STRAY DAD LIGHTNING ROUND!

ON TRAFFIC It’s been too long, and I’m not finding the time for a longer post these days. So in the meantime, here are just a few of the questions that come to mind while walking down the streets (or riding a subway through the greasy intestines) of New York: Q: I like to wearContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD LIGHTNING ROUND!”

ASK A STRAY DAD 4:

ON SURVIVING. Q: How’s New York? A: Not the worst! Q: Good to hear! I myself have been considering a move from a town I’ve grown very comfortable in, to a much bigger city. Any tips on how to survive — or even thrive — in that transition? A: You’ve gotta be more specific thanContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD 4:”

ASK A STRAY DAD 1:

On Existential Crises… *Note: This was originally written on July 27, 2019. Question 1: This doubles as an introduction. Why are we here? That’s easy. As a doting husband to Heidi and father(-ish) of four (I’ll explain later) about to embark on a super-dicey and potentially disastrous life change, I needed a place to ask myselfContinue reading “ASK A STRAY DAD 1:”

Hi. I’m lost.

My name is Jason Effmann. I’m a writer, originally from Portland, OR, who has done a very questionable thing and taken a job that has required me to move to New York City. “Well that doesn’t sound TOO bad. How’s the family adjusting?“ Um… This blog is an attempt to answer the questions my brainContinue reading “Hi. I’m lost.”